Comment Sections Make Me Sad

7 May

This past week there has been quite the brouhaha in the media about a fellow Girls Gone Sporty ambassador and her weight loss.  Her story has been covered by the Today Show, Huffington Post, every blog in the world (maybe I’m over exaggerating).  It’s a big deal.  I’d encourage you to read her story, she tells it best, and watch the movement that’s been started in her honor of women taking ownership for their own bodies. I’m so proud of Brooke and my heart hurts for her for one very big reason – comments sections.  brooke

Brooke’s story hits very close to me because as I’ve lost weight there are parts of my body that I like less now because of my loose skin.  My arms, while huge, were solid.  Now they are jiggly looking, so I’m very rarely sleeveless.  My stomach was huge and round, but now there is a flabby and flappyness that makes me sad.  DOC has mentioned that I cover it up, all the time, if you catch my drift, when I didn’t use to.  I am more ashamed of myself as I’m shrinking than I was seventy pounds ago.  I was who I was – a big girl.  I am losing weight to be healthier and a better wife and mom, but not to look better, necessarily.  Now that I’m discovering my body and am more mindful of my shape, I’m not always proud of what I see.

 

I should have never read other posts about Brooke’s story or posted it on my own page.

 

Comment sections on this story and a million others I’ve read on weight loss always make me sad. Your comment “No one needs to see that in a bikini” sounds just like “nobody wants to see your jiggly arms, Aimee.” Your comment “It is not really a picture that inspires me in my weight loss journey,” sounds to me like “Nobody wants to see you Aimee.  You might be four sizes smaller but you’re still fat and you should stay home.” Your comment “…the way her tummy looks now is not inspiring, because I’m sorry, it’s not attractive, and let’s face it, the main reason people lose weight is to look better” sounds to me like  “if you’re not skinny and tight and perfect, you’re not worth having people look at you, so go ahead and give up, Aimee, it’s not worth it.”

 

Shape magazine, and countless others, make me feel like I’m not worth it.  Real, honest, truthful women like Brooke and Cheri and Kimberly make me feel like I’m worth it and that I can do this.

All of you that follow me here and support me at home make it worth it.  Thank you! I know that none of what I hear in my own head is true.  I know that I’m a better person physically and emotionally than I was two years ago.

 

But, damn, y’all, why you gotta be so mean (Thanks, Taylor, you’re always in my head).

mean   I’ve said it before on this blog, words matter.  Be careful with what you say.

12 Responses to “Comment Sections Make Me Sad”

  1. Melissa May 7, 2014 at 9:17 pm #

    Good point. I must say I have seen a lot of support for her which I also did when I covered her story the other day. I lost 128lbs and there is a lot you can do to look and feel better as you lose weight I am proof that you can feel good after not for so long. I hope you’ll seek out those of us who have walked a similar road and have a positive outlook and not those who have narrow views of what’s healthy and attractive.

    • MS_AimeeC May 7, 2014 at 9:38 pm #

      Yes, it seems that fellow bloggers and fellow people, for the most part, who have followed the same type of path have been very supportive. It is the comment sections that really get me upset.

      Thanks for all you do to help along others! You are amazing!!!

  2. Kimberly May 8, 2014 at 4:41 am #

    I’m with you, Aimee! I don’t understand how any human being with a conscience can say those kinds of things, even if they think them, and even if they are anonymous. I admire your resolve to get healthy. Letting go of what others think is part of the mindset necessary for success. You’re on my list of people who inspire me, so keep it up! I need you. :)

    • MS_AimeeC May 9, 2014 at 1:07 am #

      WOW. Thank you! I needed that. You are amazing, Kimberly and you’ve helped me so much in such a short period of time! THANK YOU.

  3. Jen May 8, 2014 at 11:53 am #

    This is why I don’t read comments except on blogs I know and trust. People are mean. I don’t understand why anyone feels the need to tear someone else down.

    BTW, I think that YOU are AMAZING.

    • MS_AimeeC May 9, 2014 at 1:15 am #

      YOU are. The Eleanor Project and you inspire me daily!

  4. Cynthia @ You Signed Up For WHAT?! May 8, 2014 at 5:47 pm #

    Yes, comment sections are pretty cruel a lot of the time. People do hide behind computers and lash out in a way they wouldn’t do to someone’s face. I haven’t read the whole story on this since I’ve been swamped but keep meaning to read her story and participate!

    • MS_AimeeC May 9, 2014 at 1:16 am #

      Most people are amazing. Getting over the one negative comment out of 100 nice comments is so challenging!

  5. Cherie Runs This (@cherielianne) May 9, 2014 at 12:39 am #

    First thank you for the mention!!!! That means a lot to me :-)
    Second, I just found out about this story and it enraged me. And it hurt my heart. I could not have imagined getting such a response from a national publication that is supposed to be inspiring women–not making them feel shameful about their bodies. Weight loss is HARD work. She lost 170lbs for goodness sakes. Let her show off any picture she wants!!!

    • MS_AimeeC May 9, 2014 at 1:16 am #

      I mean it. You are amazing… and a Steeler chick… and AMAZING. You inspire me to keep going.

  6. Hailey May 12, 2014 at 1:14 am #

    I read Brooke’s blog post and could not believe the terrible comments she received. I think it’s such an inspiring story. I run in a sports bra most of the summer here in Arizona, but for the longest time I wouldn’t because I have a couple of scars from a few abdominal surgeries. It finally took my mom saying it’s other people’s problem for saying things or staring and not mine to make me feel comfortable running without a shirt. So that’s what I thought of when I saw her story. Only listen to that voice in your head when it tells you that you are worth it, because that’s the only time it’s right:)

  7. eatsandexercisebyamber May 30, 2014 at 12:04 pm #

    Aimee, no matter what, the world will be full of people who are down right ugly and mean. Whether your a size two or twenty, there will be people who are going to TRY and bring you down, regardless of your size or shape! SO what’s to be done? IGNORE THEM, because YOU are getting healthy for YOU! Your loose skin, and flabbiness are reminders of your strength and hard work you’ve dedicated to becoming a healthier and better version of you. To some, it may not be pretty, but who cares what they think. Learn to be kinder to yourself, and slowly accept these parts of you by seeing them in a more positive light. You don’t have to love them wholly at first, but work on it, remind yourself that those parts are there from hard work and dedication and you are healtiher because of it! <3

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